Diary: The haunting of Diary’s inbox

It’s Halloween, Diary’s favourite time of the year, and we are deep into The Haunting of Bly Manor on Netflix to celebrate.

While we’re in the mood for spooky properties, Top Ten Real Estate News has been in touch to share its top 10 haunted homes – well, actually, nine ghoulish houses and one entire ghost town (all in the US).

They include a $298,500 Pennsylvania home used in The Silence of the Lambs and a Massachusetts house where axe murderer Lizzie Borden once lived ($890,000). Then there is “LA’s Black Dahlia murder house” and the actual Amityville Horror property in New York, which last sold for $605,000 in 2017.

The “world’s biggest ghost house” is said to be Lynnewood Hall in Pennsylvania, pictured, where AB Widener died “consumed with guilt and grief” three years after he sank money into the Titanic, which went down on its maiden voyage with his son and grandson on board.

Apparently, “it is said that the three Widener ghosts are still its caretakers”. Listed for $20m in 2014, then reduced to $16.5m a year later, it still has not sold.

But if that isn’t enough, why not acquire Uptop, Colorado, a once-thriving tourist town left in a frightful state. Recently restored, the ghost town went on the market in 2014 for $2m, including “train depot, dance hall, saloon and chapel”. At the risk of bingeworthy TV overkill, it seems ideal for anyone adventurous enough to open a real-life Westworld


Hanging like Dracula

The investment tips don’t stop with Lynnewood Hall. If you’re an eccentric billionaire looking for a des-res with just the right level of foreboding, high-net-worth mortgage broker Enness Global has pulled together 13 castles just waiting to be “Halloween homes with a difference” for those at the upper end of the global housing market. Top of the list is Glenborrodale Castle in Scotland, on the market for £3.75m, but there are plenty of spooky options across the UK, Spain, Germany and France. “A three-million-pound price tag won’t secure you a huge deal in the global high-end market, and in many major cities you’re looking at a fairly decent flat,” said MD Hugh Wade-Jones, frighteningly. But getting creative pays dividends. “In fact, you could secure a whole castle for a similar price tag in countries all over the world,” he added, “and whether you’re looking for a Halloween-appropriate home or a Covid-safe bolthole, you will get a lot more space for your money. As well as some additional fortification.”


Netflix and chills

One of the absolute best things about Halloween is Halloween press releases, and this year we have to tip our witch’s hat to OnBuy.com for an absolute scream. “Killer kids, creepy clowns, and spiders,” it begins, guaranteeing publication already, before continuing: “Many of us have had nightmares about being haunted or chased by these scary creatures. But have you ever considered how long we spend being chased when our worst nightmares come to life on screen?” No, we haven’t. Nobody has! But now OnBuy has, and the methodology used is pure, unhinged genius. First, they worked out the number of movies on Netflix featuring various types of “movie predator”. Compiling runtimes, they calculated how long we spend being chased/scared by different ghoulies. Then – and here’s the science bit –  to “put the figures into perspective”, they looked up the distance between London and Edinburgh/Birmingham/Manchester, and “the total chase distance for each predator was divided by each geographical distance”, assuming a 15km/hr “chasing speed”. It is brilliant in its complexity. Unsurprisingly, serial killers are the apex movie predator. “From running into lakes, hiding behind bushes, and climbing staircases, we spend in total 121 hours and 50 minutes running from psycho killers on Netflix,” OnBuy reveals. “This is comparable to running from London to Edinburgh three times.” Aliens, by comparison, chase us for 108 hours (London to Birmingham nine times), with demons stalking us to the second city six times, and ghosts a mere four times. Who knew watching horror films on Netflix made us an ultra-marathon runner?


Rising from the grave…

…as a retail treat? Or the ultimate cruel trick? To considerable excitement (and widespread media coverage), @UKWoolworths announced on Twitter this week: “Here to save 2020! Woolworths is coming back to your high street, as a physical store! A couple of legal things to get sorted, but we’re full steam ahead at Woolworths HQ.” A caveat soon followed: plans were for three trial stores, and in late 2021. A request for views on what the public wanted from “#YourWoolworths” was met largely with nostalgia from those eager for their pic’n’mix fix – plus the odd bit of shoplifting confession catharsis. But murmurings of “fake news” quickly grew louder when the account twice spelt the household name as “Woolsworths” and Very – the owner of the UK trademark for Woolworths – denied all knowledge. Despite accruing 4,000 followers in a matter of hours, @UKWoolworths was branded a hoax by the BBC. Cue much anguish among the EG staff. 2020 – why do you keep doing this to us? Though clearly the demand is there. Very, over to you…

Images © Matt Rourke/AP/Shutterstock, Nils Jorgensen/Shutterstock