Diary: Santa Claus is coming to towns

When you’re looking for a new home, what are the key criteria you apply? Number of bedrooms? Whether it’s detached or not? School catchment area? How about Santa-friendliness?

It pays to live somewhere that jolly old Saint Nick can get to easily – and the good people at Jackson-Stops have done all the hard work so that you can make the right move in time for next year’s festive season.

Comparing complex data on population density (so the reindeer can quickly hop from roof to roof) and “abundance of chimneys”, it has concluded that Hull, Hastings and Stoke-on-Trent top the charts for “Santa-friendly” homes.

Hull coming first on a ranking of places to live? It’s a Christmas miracle!


Opportunity mocked

“Draft” might have been in the title of mayor of London Sadiq Khan’s London Plan, but it’s a little surprising to see that GLA staffers had confused major transport nodes with human organs in the strategy document.

“Opportunity area in the London Plan. Gut feeling it may change,” quipped sharp-eyed Simon Ricketts, partner at Town Legal, while pointing out on Twitter that one such area had been identified in the official document as “King’s Cross – St Pancreas”.

He had to dig deep to spot it – all the way to page 91 of a 524-page monster – which is impressive dedication to detail in December.

It’s a common error, Diary suspects, though one you’d hope might be avoided by the mayor’s crack team. If the industry can expect any changes in the next version, fixing this mix-up will hopefully be one of them.


X marks the spot

When Diary was a lad, one of the highlights of the week was filling out Nan’s Spot the Ball entry. One time we even won… a tenner. Happy times.

So it’s been sad to see how, in the National Lottery era, the popularity of the competition has dwindled into obscurity.

Exciting, then, to hear that Spot the Ball is back as a way to buy property! Scottish firm Tentacle Solutions is behind software that allows for the sale of big-ticket items by punters marking X on a football-free football photo.

The mainstream press may have got all excited over the sale of a £3.5m home, but Diary’s eye is caught by a nugget further down the press release that reveals that “prizes” have included a quaint tea shop in St Ives, Cornwall.

That’s commercial property in Diary’s book. This changes everything for investors going forward. Yes, it’s a whole new ball game.


Don’t give up the day job

Diary is counting down the days to Christmas, thanks to this year’s gratefully received Malcolm Hollis advent calendar.

The daily chocolate treat is sure to make us smile – which is more than can be said for the jokes hidden behind each door.

Day one: Why did no one buy Rudolph and Blitzen? They were two deer.

Day two: Why did the Christmas pudding take a prune to the party? It couldn’t find a date.

Day three: What do you call a kid who doesn’t believe in Santa? A rebel without a Claus.

It’s going to be a long December. With a picture of a Christmas cracker on the front, we should have known what we were in for – and indeed, Malcolm Hollis is all too aware that it’s more at home with the serious business of surveying.

As the slogan reads: “Luckily our advice is better than our jokes.”


Digital Diary

This may be the last print issue of 2017, but fear not, there is more to come from your favourite page as we head online for Digital December.

Plus, keep your eyes – and ears – out for a special podcast review of the year according to Diary. The future is soon-ish.


Find out about free online access for Digital December at www.egi.co.uk/digitaldecemberoffer/