Diary: Handle with care

The Covid-19 pandemic has been a revelation for one previously unheralded body part. Cometh the hour, cometh the elbow.

Previously only really noticed when painfully bashed, or while hurting after tennis, the joint has pulled double duty during the crisis – its inside is heroically catching our sneezes, while its outside offered a popular substitute for hand-shaking, pre full-on social distancing. Now, perhaps, it will be taking on more tasks. Finnish clean-energy company Fortum has launched a sustainable hands-free door handle made of 3D-printed recycled plastic, which provides a “simple add-on to existing door handles, allowing people to open doors with their arm, minimising touching the handles with their palms and fingers”. When we return to our workplaces no doubt far more germ-conscious than before, will our elbows be opening doors for us?


28 days later

Four weeks after the lockdown began, our permitted daily exercise was put to good use by one of Diary’s colleagues, who made an intrepid trek across London from Kensington and Chelsea to EG’s home in the City – all to rescue a stash of business cards left behind. Admin, as she freely admits, is not her strong suit. Cue a photo update of her journey shared on Microsoft Teams, the empty streets somewhat reminiscent of, yes, 28 Days Later. Although no zombies were spotted, the capital was not devoid of people taking advantage of a sunny day… all of which made social distancing on London’s slimline pavements a challenge. At least the City of London Corporation’s promise to create wider pavements around Bank seems rather well-timed. While the streets may not have been entirely empty, retail windows were, with dummies forlornly staring out of windows on Oxford Street and Mike Ashley’s Sports Direct store most definitely shut. Leadenhall Market was also eerily quiet without its usual throng from the insurance world drinking their worries away. The suited-and-booted crowd are no more – now the City belongs to lycra-clad runners and cyclists, and hi-vis-sporting construction workers.

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The eye of the tiger

Diary may be the last person left who hasn’t seen Tiger King. The Netflix phenomenon does not, by reputation, portray humanity at its best – but, it seems, it can inspire greatness in others. Step forward Mike Powell, senior transactions manager at Legal & General Investment Management, who has promised that, if he can raise £3,000 for NHS Charities Together, he will get his hair cut “in the style of his new hero, Joe Exotic, the Tiger King”. And, if Powell manages to smash through his target in a manner similar to national hero Captain Tom Moore, he “will consider the tattoos and piercings as an encore”. At the time of writing, he is 83% of the way to the initial target – and fingers crossed this plug will put a tiger in his tank on the way to millions. To put Powell in a blond mullet, donate at: https://www.justgiving.com/fundraising/mike-powell10


Auctioneer on a roll

As noted previously in Diary, auctioneers have been busy proving that their market can still function through the lockdown by switching to remote-bidding only sales. But, if you thought a live video-stream might be a rather sterile affair, with none of the excitement and energy of the auction room, you should take a look at the inimitable Andrew Binstock in action. Highlights of a recent sale shared by Auction House London show that, with him holding the gavel, the drama doesn’t have to be lost. Likening the fast and furious remote bids from mysterious figures like “Mr A” to a game show, the theatrical Binstock certainly wouldn’t be out of place hosting one. Binstock previously set up his own website, auctionyourproperty.com, back in the noughties, but told EG that he preferred to see “the balls of their eyes”. Since lockdown he has also nostalgically tweeted about seeing a past episode of Homes Under the Hammer featuring one of his sales. But he is clearly managing just fine. In his own words, “this is how we roll.”

 


Not-so common or garden

As the lockdown continues, never has the line been more pronounced between the haves and the have-nots. By which we mean, those that have gardens, and those that do not. For years we may have neglected them, but now they are our own private paradises and a sunny background for the day’s video meetings. So, with Diary having already offered you the ideal fictional homes to hunker down in, it’s only natural to present the best movie gardens in which to chillax. “Garden furniture experts” FarawayFurniture.com did the hard work, surveying the public to find out “which famous film gardens Brits want to escape to most”. And top of the pile comes from the 2005 version of Pride and Prejudice, thanks to the scene where Mr Darcy makes his confession to Elizabeth “in the devastatingly romantic location of Stourhead Garden”. Joint second goes to an unlikely pairing of The Great Gatsby (2013) – good show, old sport – and, of all things, Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon. According to Faraway, the outside space where Chow Yun-Fat, Michelle Yeoh and Zhang Ziyi do battle “ups the escapism fantasy” with its swaying bamboo trees. Other notables include the labyrinth from Pan’s Labyrinth, The Secret Garden (but don’t tell anyone) and Tim Burton’s colourful vision of Alice in Wonderland.